GIVEN HER BACKGROUND, MAMA SHOULDN'T PREACH

Madonna may have no qualms about baring her soul (or more) tothe world, but when it comes to her baby, that's a different story.

After "Hard Copy" aired video footage of the new mommy withdaughter Lourdes Maria (apparently shot from a neighboring house),she fired off a statement that read:

"I'm fully cognizant that when one is a public figure, havingone's picture taken goes with the territory of fame. But when I'min the confines of my own home, my sanctuary, I can't help but feelviolated by the invasion of my privacy ..."My daughter is not a public figure. She is a week-old childwho does not deserve to be exploited this way."Replied a "Hard Copy "spokesman: "Quite frankly, we aresurprised that Madonna is stunned by anything."Loose talkJoan Collins, on which of her movies ("Decadence," "Sins,""Revenge," "The Stud" and "The Bitch") best describes her life (inEntertainment Weekly): "I'm not decadent. I'm not sinful. I'm notout for revenge. I'm not a stud. And I can occasionally be abitch."If he's not Michael, it isn't really JermaineRandy Jackson turns 35 today.Guess there'll be a little less `ER' on `ET'George Clooney, upset over footage of him and his girlfriendthat appeared on the Paramount-produced "Hard Copy," says he willno longer talk to Paramount's more legitimate "EntertainmentTonight" show. "At some point, you've got to say, `What are you incontrol of?"' Clooney said in USA Today. "This is kind of a warningshot."In case you thought it was an immoral fiberWoody Harrelson, who wants industrial hemp legalized as analternative to cutting down forests to produce paper, presented a$500 prize Saturday to a Kentucky eighth-grader who won his hempessay contest. "I learned that hemp can be used for about 25,000different things," said Jenny Kinchen. "It really isn't the same asmarijuana."But she was only famous for the first 15Supermodel Kim Alexis was not only honorary chairman of abenefit 5-kilometer race in Buffalo on Sunday to help young peoplewith drug problems, she ran - and won her age group, finishing in22 minutes.Well, hello, Dalai - and hello, dollyAnd supermodel Naomi Campbell joined the Dalai Lama, thespiritual leader of Tibet, as the co-host of a charity gala in theGerman city of Neuss over the weekend to benefit the children ofthe world.Nothing but the sound of one glove clappingDespite protests by Muslim leaders who denounced his music,Michael Jackson played to a sold-out soccer stadium Sunday in KualaLumpur, Malaysia. "How can Michael's concert be immoral and have abad effect on youth?" said one 17-year-old concertgoer. "If that isimmoral, what about all sorts of things on Internet, movies andsongs. Then everything should be banned and what would we haveleft?"